For as long as I can remember I have wanted to write. But I’ve been afraid. A part of me hopes I have some ability, part of me doesn’t care, I just love to put words on a page. These last few months blogging are the start of what has been at the top of my ‘I wish I could’ list for decades. And I’m loving it.
I know why I’ve been scared.
Aside from the fact that writing is so personal and completely subjective, back in my school days I was completely burnt by a teacher. We had to submit a creative writing assessment for Year 11 English on the topic of our choice. It was a process worked on in class over weeks – except I didn’t do much work in class. I poured the composition out two nights before it was due – and I was pretty happy with what I had done.
The following week the Dean summoned me to his office. I was given the paper back with a huge red ‘F’ and ‘plagiarized’ written across the top. Gutted. I was not an F student, and I was mortified that anyone would think I would cheat – especially as I hadn’t! Apparently that teacher had deemed my writing ‘too good’ given the small amount of work I had done in class and assumed I copied it from a senior student (this is pre-internet days!).
On the one hand, I should have been flattered I guess, I wrote something so good, it was unbelievably mine. But all that stayed with me was the big red ‘F’, the disbelief and accusation in the teacher’s eyes.
What I know now, is that a lot of my writing takes place in my head. So back then, while I appeared to be mucking around in class, my brain was actually doing the prep work. Maybe that’s the same for many of you? By the time I actually put words on paper, an idea has formed and the key words are already getting to know each other.
Two decades later it’s probably time to let go of that one teacher’s comments and stretch my writing muscles. So far my blog has been more of a journal but I’m looking forward to seeing if I can take myself to the front of the queue and add ‘writing’ as a genuine hobby, not just on my wish list.
This post is in response to The Daily Post’s Daily Prompt: Is there something you’ve always wanted to do, but never got around to starting (an activity, a hobby, or anything else, really)? Tell us about it — and tell us about what’s keeping you from doing it.